


The Winchester Supremacy extras

by zubeneschamali



Series: The Bourne Trilogy [4]
Category: Supernatural, Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M, Timestamp, soundtrack, spy!Jensen, spy!Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:21:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24234226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zubeneschamali/pseuds/zubeneschamali
Summary: Soundtrack and timestamp to The Winchester Supremacy. For everyone who wanted to hear more about Sam's POV.
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Sam Winchester
Series: The Bourne Trilogy [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1614190
Comments: 6
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Book 1: Morro Bay  
Chapter 1**: Long Walk Home (Bruce Springsteen)  
Here everybody has a neighbor  
Everybody has a friend  
Everybody has a reason to begin again  
**Chapter 2** : Easy Tonight (Five For Fighting)  
Don't know where I'm going yet  
But I sure am getting there  
**Chapter 3** : Your Own Worst Enemy (Bruce Springsteen)  
The times they got too clear  
So you removed all the mirrors  
Once the family felt secure  
Now no one's very sure  
**Chapter 4** : Something's Burning (Kenny Rogers)  
I cup my hands to touch your face  
And once again I feel your fire  
And here it comes  
**Chapter 5** : Careful What You Pack (They Might Be Giants)  
Waving from the shore, never knew before  
Doesn't understand  
She's in trouble  
**Chapter 6** : Let's Be Friends (Bruce Springsteen)  
Don't know when this chance might come again  
Good times got a way of comin' to an end

**Book 2: Sydney  
Chapter 1**: Electron Blue (R.E.M.)  
Adventure's laid its claim on you  
It's all you want to do  
**Chapter 2** : Everything Right Is Wrong Again (They Might Be Giants)  
Wake me when it's over, touch my face  
Tell me every word has been erased  
**Chapter 3** : Too Little Too Late (Barenaked Ladies)  
I'm gaining strength  
Tryin' to pull my own weight  
I'm gaining pounds  
At the precipice of too late  
**Chapter 4** : Boat Parade (Five For Fighting)  
And we can make it right  
If we sail all night  
Better pray for a breeze  
**Chapter 5** : I Shall Believe (Sheryl Crow)  
Come to me now  
And lay your hands over me  
Even if it's a lie  
Say it will be alright  
And I shall believe  
**Chapter 6** : Make It All Okay (R.E.M.)  
It's a long, long long road  
And I don't know which way to go  
If you offered me your hand again  
I'd have to walk away

**Book 3: San Francisco  
Chapter 1**: Under the Weather (KT Tunstall)  
When I turn out the light  
You're out of sight  
Although I know that I'm not alone  
Feels like home  
**Chapter 2** : Half a Heart (Barenaked Ladies)  
Anyone with half a heart would help me out  
Before they ever let the other half find out  
But if they could see how far I've let you down  
Anyone with half a heart would let me drown  
**Chapter 3** : Something You'll Never Find (Barenaked Ladies)  
You're looking for something  
That you'll never find  
You've got the questions  
You've got the time  
You've got the bruises  
To show you've been blind  
**Chapter 4** : Weather Channel (Sheryl Crow)  
Sunny morning  
You can hear it  
Siren's warning  
There's weather on both sides  
And I know it's coming  
**Chapter 5** : Headlights on Dark Roads (Snow Patrol)  
Headlights before me  
So beautiful, so clear  
Reach out and take it  
'Cause I'm so tired of all this fear  
**Chapter 6** : Sleeping at the Wheel (Matchbox Twenty)  
We know the end is overrated  
We've became the walls we raise  
We don't believe enough but we still cared  
Standing on the edge without a prayer

**Book 4: California  
Chapter 1**: At Least We're Dreaming (Eve 6)  
I don’t even know what I'm lookin' for  
I'm waitin' for someone to come along and find me  
**Chapter 2** : Blood and Fire (Indigo Girls)  
Nothing left to hold  
Nothing left but blood and fire  
**Chapter 3** : The Devil in the Wishing Well (Five For Fighting)  
I took a guess and cut a portion out of my heart  
He said that's nowhere close enough but it's a damn good start  
**Chapter 4** : Running (No Doubt)  
Sometimes it's hard to keep on running  
We work so much to keep it going  
Don't make me want to give up  
**Chapter 5** : Where Are You Going? (Dave Matthews Band)  
I am no Superman  
I have no answers for you  
I am no hero, oh, that's for sure  
But I do know one thing  
Where you are is where I want to be  
**Chapter 6** : Further On (Up the Road) (Bruce Springsteen)  
Where the road is dark and the seed is sowed  
Where the gun is cocked and the bullet's cold

**Book 5: Marseille  
Chapter 1**: Square One (Coldplay)  
You wonder if your chance will ever come  
Or if you're stuck in square one  
**Chapter 2** : Where the Streets Have No Name (U2)  
We're still building, then burning down love  
Burning down love  
And when I go there, I go there with you  
It's all I can do  
**Chapter 3** : Crack the Shutters (Snow Patrol)  
Crack the shutters open wide  
I wanna bathe you in the light of day…  
'Cause the daylight seems to want you  
Just as much as I want you  
**Chapter 4** : Take Back the City (Snow Patrol)  
God knows you put your life in its hands  
And it’s both cradled you and crushed  
But now it’s time to make your own demands  
**Chapter 5** : Heal Over (KT Tunstall)  
Everybody sails alone  
But we can travel side by side  
**Chapter 6** : You're All I Have (Snow Patrol)  
Under your skin feels like home  
Electric shocks on aching bones…  
It's so clear now that you are all that I have  
I have no fear 'cause you are all that I have


	2. From the Other Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Backstory/missing scenes from The Winchester Identity and The Winchester Supremacy. Sam's perspective on the events that Jensen was trying so hard to remember, including how a hunter came to be something like a secret agent and how he felt about the way it all came to an end. Warning: fic-canon character death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This started as a way to keep Sam's backstory straight in my head while writing the AU of Supernatural that's entwined with Jared and Jensen's story in both The Winchester Identity and Supremacy. In other words, massive spoilers ahead if you haven't read both of those stories. To keep the story in the Js' point of view, I had to leave out a lot that they wouldn't have known or understood, even if the readers would. This piece fills in some of those blanks and lets Sam have a voice in his story.

The first time Sam Winchester saw Jensen Ackles, it was only the roomful of people around them that kept him from whipping out a silver knife and holding it to the man's throat.

As it was, he came to a dead stop and had to be prodded in the back by one of his new classmates to keep moving towards the chairs where the newcomers were to be seated. All through the welcoming speech and introductions, while they were being told that they were the best and brightest and most gifted people in the country who had come to study at the Defense Language Institute, the kind of thing that Sam had expected to tune out because his reason for being here was so different from everyone else's that he might as well _be_ from another country, he didn't take his eyes off the man who was a dead ringer for his brother, dead these two years. 

Whatever the orientation consisted of, Sam missed it all.

It wasn't until later, when Sam could sidle up to Ackles and sneak in a "Christo," and later pretend to spill a drink on him that was really holy water from the flask he still carried, that he started thinking maybe he hadn't been dragged back into a life of hunting despite his determination to give it up after it had cost both his brother and his father their lives. And it wasn't until the next morning, when he sat across from the man at breakfast and carefully catalogued every inch that he could see and saw no wendigo scar along his ear, no mark from a witch's spell on the back of his hand, and freckles in slightly different locations than the ones on Dean's face, that he began to realize this really was someone else.

What the odds were of him happening across Dean's doppelganger, Sam had no idea, but apparently, he'd done it.

He soon found that Jensen was a nice guy, a little quiet with people he didn't know, but nevertheless friendly. Sam returned the friendly nods and gave short answers to any questions, feeling it like a slap in the face every time he looked up and saw Dean's face, or at least close enough to Dean's face that it had him missing his brother so bad it hurt like a knife in his gut all over again.

Jensen called him on it one time, after he'd walked into a room while Jensen was laughing over a joke from one of their classmates and promptly turned and walked out again. He simply couldn't hear that joyous laugh without being resentful that Dean had so rarely gotten to laugh like that and now never would. Jensen had cornered him outside the building where he'd run and made him blurt out why he was here and all that he had lost and how Jensen couldn't help but remind him of it. After that, Jensen kept his distance, still friendly but not pushing. 

Of course, that was what made Sam confide in him more—that and the fact that Jensen was a freaking savant when it came to languages, and unless it was Latinate, Sam wasn't. Not that he was a slouch at memorizing pronunciation or vocabulary, but he'd never really worried about the finer points of Aramaic or Cherokee grammar when shouting an incantation at an attacking spirit. Jensen was patient with him as he studied, was a good friend to him as he learned that it was possible to build a life without his family and not feel like he didn't deserve it. Slowly, ever so slowly, Sam started to relax into this new, different life.

It took a long, long time—most of a year—before Sam realized that Jensen was starting to become more than a good friend. He'd never dated a guy before, but he could recognize the way his stomach swooped when he caught sight of Jensen, or the way he felt warmer when any part of them was touching, even something as inconsequential as their shoulders brushing as they walked. At first it freaked him out—this guy was the spitting image of his _brother_ , and there was no way that crushing on him could be mentally healthy. But he hadn't associated Jensen with Dean for a while, and so he let himself think about what it would be like, and it wasn't an entirely unpleasant thought.

Then one day they were both approached by a man named Alex Conklin, who knew some of the teachers at the DLI and had been sent in their direction. He explained that he worked for a firm called Ravenswood that did private consulting for the government, high-security work that sometimes required excellent translation skills, and would they be interested?

They talked it over together one night on the beach, the lights of Monterey twinkling around the other side of the curve of the bay. Jensen voiced his doubts that "translation" was all they were being recruited for, something Sam had figured was obvious. But then, Jensen wasn't used to watching carefully for lies and secrecy on someone's face, reading their features and their words and knowing there was more to the story than what was being spoken. Sam had seen the telltale signs on Alex Conklin's face and known there was more that they weren't being told, and when he explained those signs to Jensen, he got a curious look, but no questions. 

Nor did Jensen back down from his desire to take the job offer.

While it hurt to think of Jensen learning to do what Sam could, to look for deception and count on mistrust and lose the innocence that was one of the things Sam cherished about him, he knew they would both make damn good "consultants." And he liked the idea that even if hunting was something he could never do again, not when it had taken his family away from him, there was still a way that he could put his skills to use. He thought that Dad and Dean might even be proud of him, choosing another way of saving the world than the one he had been raised to do.

So and Jensen agreed to it, and a month later, they were sharing an apartment in Arlington, VA, when they weren't jetting around the world doing the work of Ravenswood and the government. It started as delivering messages, translating documents, other little things that meant they could joke about being secret agents without doing anything they were uncomfortable with. It led to carrying guns, at first only for their own protection. Sam was completely comfortable with it, but it took Jensen a while to get used to.

But the first time Sam killed another human being, it was Jensen who helped him deal with it. For all that Sam was familiar with blood and gore, he had no way to process taking another human life, even when that person had been pointing a gun at him and tightening his finger on the trigger. Jensen was patient and a good listener, but also able to kick Sam's ass when he started falling too heavily into the guilt, and that was when Sam knew that he was in trouble, or at least his heart was. He'd never dated at Stanford after Dean and John had died, had thrown himself completely into his studies and figured that if he'd turned away from them and hadn't been there to watch their backs, the least he could do was be the best damn college student he could be. 

So this awareness that he was not only attracted to Jensen, but seriously falling for him, was a shock. He watched Jensen closely for signs, and from time to time he thought he saw a spark of interest, but from what Jensen had said about his conservative family, even if there was a closet for him to come out of, it wasn't likely to happen.

Then one July night in London, they overheard a conversation that suggested something big was going down, and by the time they got it to the proper channels, it was too late. People died that day because they hadn't been fast enough, and the old familiar guilt started gnawing away at Sam as if it had been waiting to pounce on him all these years.

Jensen took it harder, like it had just now sunk in that their jobs had life-or-death consequences for people they would never meet, and Sam tried to be there for him as best he could. They talked till all hours of the morning, sometimes sober and sometimes drunk, but they were both stone cold sober when Jensen leaned over and pressed his lips against Sam's, winding his arms around him like he wanted to climb inside him and disappear. Sam let him take what he needed, and then he confessed that he'd been thinking about this for a long time.

It turned out that Jensen had been thinking of it for even longer.

Neither of them had ever fooled around with another guy before, so they went slowly at first, kissing and touching for weeks before taking off any clothing. Once Sam had his hands on Jensen's bare skin, though, he couldn't stop. They came together with awkwardness and embarrassed laughter and afterwards, an amount of peace that was more than Sam had known in years. 

They fumbled their way through a few more encounters, and then it started to get good, really good, to the point where Sam started thinking that maybe it was time to tell Jensen something more about his past than the fact that his family was all dead.

Then the visions started.

At first, of course, Sam didn't know they were visions; all he knew was that he'd awakened in the middle of the night with a splitting headache and the horrifying, vivid image embedded in his mind of Jensen being blown apart by an explosion. When it happened again the next night the exact same way, he kept enough presence of mind to pay attention to what was going on in the background, and when he recognized the Paris metro, he figured all he had to do was keep them away from France for the rest of their lives.

Of course, that was where their next assignment was, and when Alex said that it had something to do with the same group that had attacked London, there was no dissuading Jensen from going, no matter how hard Sam tried. Since he couldn't exactly use "I had a bad dream" as a valid reason, he determined to stick to Jensen's side like glue and make sure it stayed a nightmare. 

Afterwards, Sam never could explain to the satisfaction of everyone at Ravenswood how he had known the face of the man who was planting the explosives in the Metro tunnels, but when he recognized him from his vision, he and Jensen took him down without any incident. 

At least until his accomplice who _hadn't_ been part of the vision showed up and gave Jensen a tremendous shove, sending him flying onto the subway tracks as a train was pulling into the station. Sam hadn't been so scared since he'd seen a werewolf's jaws inches away from Dean's face, and he screamed as loudly as Jensen did when Jensen wasn't able to entirely get out of the way in time.

It was only a broken leg, but it was badly broken, and Jensen was going to be incapacitated for months. Sam spent the first week of it being scared to death, and the next week furious at himself for not acting faster and at the universe for almost taking away the only remaining good thing in his life.

Then he started being scared of himself, because he had another vision of a horrible death, this one a young woman and her two children being pinned under fallen furniture as their house went up in flames around them. When he happened across the news item that showed it had taken place—in Lawrence, Kansas—dark fear crawled up his spine and wouldn't let him go. 

It got worse that night, because his dreams were filled with a man with yellow eyes who told him he was destined for great things and that he could do anything, even bring Dean and Dad back, if Sam was willing to hear what he had to say.

He woke up in a cold sweat and knew he had to get out of there. Jensen was at home recuperating, able to get around on his own, and Sam had gone back to work without him, but this was different. He had to get away until he sorted this out; he couldn't put Jensen in danger from something he couldn't possibly understand. 

So when Sam got an assignment halfway around the world in Indonesia, he went gladly. The assignment was simple, acting as a messenger for a few days and checking up on some existing informants on other days. It left him with plenty of time to think, and to pore over the pages of his father's journal that he'd kept tucked away ever since he got the world-ending call from a motel owner in Arizona that there were some last effects waiting for him. He hadn't looked at the journal since, unable to bear the feel of the worn leather cover or the smell of stale cigarette smoke and worn-down motel rooms that seemed to permeate the pages, unable to bear the reminder of how he'd let his family down. 

Here, now, when he needed it, it was good to touch the familiar pages and imagine his father's steady hand writing down the words, or Dean adding a few details later in his bolder hand. He didn't find anything about visions, or anything about himself, which he had half-feared when he pulled the journal out of the box where it had been for safekeeping. 

What he did find was the mention of a weapon he'd never known about: a gun made by Samuel Colt himself, rumored to be able to kill any being, supernatural or otherwise. John had noted its last known location in Colorado but apparently hadn't tried to obtain it from its current owner. Sam made a note of the location and read on.

All the while, the dreams kept coming, the same man with yellow eyes in each one. Eventually, Sam started to pretend that he was listening in order to see what would happen. As good as he'd been before college at playing the sympathetic listener and getting people to open up to him, he was even better now after working with Ravenswood for the better part of a year. He strung the demon along—because what else could it be, given that it was promising to bring his family back to him alive and well?—until he got it to agree to meet him in the flesh. 

When he got back to the States, Jensen was working at home, doing some of the translating he had supposedly taken the job in order to do in the first place. Sam hesitated only briefly before deciding to leave him again to meet the man with the yellow eyes. This was something he had to do, for himself and for their future, and there was no way he could tell Jensen about it. Not until it was all over.

What he did do was start touching Jensen, as carefully as he could get away with before Jensen growled that his leg was broken, not his dick, and what followed was one of the more passionate nights Sam had ever had, the first time they'd managed to be completely together since Jensen was hurt. 

Afterwards, when they were lying sweaty and spent in each other's arms, Sam hesitantly said, "Jensen, there are things I've told you that I've never told another soul…but you should know that there are also things that I will _never_ tell anyone else. You should know that before we…" He gestured awkwardly and went silent.

Jensen raised himself up onto one elbow and said, a smile playing around his lips, "Before we what? Have sex? Go steady?"

"Before you fall for me the way I've fallen for you," Sam said bluntly.

Jensen's eyes softened, and he raised Sam's hand to his lips and gently kissed the back of it. "Too late," he said huskily. "I'm in love with you, Sam Winchester. Even if you haven't told me everything about you, even if you never will—I _know_ who you are. And I love you."

That made it even harder for Sam to leave the next morning on the pretext of an assignment in Seattle, but it also made it easier to make the journey he had to, knowing what would be waiting for him once he was through. He traveled to Colorado and found the cabin of a hunter named Daniel Elkins. He made an offer to borrow the gun that Elkins not only refused, but practically kicked him out on his ass for even suggesting, John Winchester's boy or no. 

Then Sam waited till Elkins was out, broke in, and made off with the Colt, swearing to himself that he would return it as soon as the demon who haunted his dreams was dead.

When he got to Arizona, to the same no-name town where Dean and John had died at the hands of what Sam had later figured out to be a daeva, the demon was waiting for him. He made the same offer to restore the Winchesters, even showed Sam a vision of what it would be like, the three of them together again, saving people and hunting things. 

It physically hurt to think of it, of what he was giving up. But Sam had been raised to never believe in a promise coming from something evil, and the whispered promises he had exchanged with Jensen were louder in his ears than the temptations being offered by the being in front of him.

When he drew the Colt, the yellow-eyed demon laughed. "You have no idea what I am, do you, Sammy?"

"It doesn't matter," he replied. He drew a bead on the demon's forehead and added, "Don't call me Sammy."

When he pulled the trigger, the surprise on the demon's face mirrored Sam's own as he watched a pulse of supernatural light radiate outward from the creature before it crumpled onto the dusty ground, dead. He sprinkled it with holy water, just to be sure, but the body didn't hiss and smoke.

Sam didn't hear the sirens until they were almost upon him, and being caught over a dead body with a bullet hole in it while he held the murder weapon in his hand would have been stupid enough that he could almost hear the dead demon laughing at him. Unfortunately, in his haste to get away, the Colt fell out of the back of his waistband as he was vaulting over a chain-link fence, and going back for it would have meant getting caught for sure. At least he'd been wearing light gloves for protection from the chilly January mountain air. But the guilt at not being able to return Daniel Elkins's gun would gnaw at him for some time.

Still, Sam made his way back home feeling accomplished and satisfied that he'd put everything about hunting behind him and that he was free and clear from here on out. There were no more visions of Jensen or anyone else dying a horrible death, and Sam decided there was no need to reopen his past for Jensen or anyone. Even though the job got rougher and more complicated, it was so much better than demons and visions that Sam was able to power through it with little difficulty.

He and Jensen grew closer, not only from sharing their dangerous workloads but from spending time together in more intimate ways. Though they never told Alex or anyone else at Ravenswood, they understood that their relationship was tacitly accepted. Sam was astonished when Jensen said that he wanted to tell his parents that he had a boyfriend, and he was heartbroken when they rejected him for it. The thought that family could turn on itself like that, that who Jensen loved was unacceptable to them, made him want to go down to Texas and do…he didn't know what, but it would be violent and unsatisfying and ultimately no help at all.

So they soldiered on, the two of them alone in the world except for each other. Then in December, with the snow about to fall and the winds cold and bitter, they were told to retrieve a document from a man in Marseille. Jensen complained that they were going to be away from home for Christmas, and Sam promised that they'd have their own celebration in France instead. They shared a night in a little inn on the waterfront, what Jensen promised was only a taste of what was to come, and Sam couldn't remember looking forward to Christmas so much in his life.

Then it all went to hell.

Their contact was nervous and jittery enough to raise red flags, but before Sam could shut it down and get them out of there, they were being fired on. They were pinned down in a side street, Sam grimly aware that they didn't have enough ammo between them to fight their way out, even if Jensen didn't know it yet. Jensen had joked before about going out in a blaze of glory, but he sounded too much like Dean when he said it, and Sam had snapped at him and stalked away. Now, Sam refused to let it happen. Not both of them, not like this.

So he told Jensen to run, that he'd give him cover and meet up with him later. One swift, hard kiss was all Sam was able to get in, and he'd never know if Jensen understood it for the goodbye that it was. They counted to three, and when Jensen took off running, Sam stood up and fired in the direction of the last muzzle flashes he'd seen, every instinct yelling at him to get the fuck down and not make a target out of himself like that. But out of the corner of his eye, he could see that Jensen was almost in the clear; just another couple of steps and he'd be—

The sudden shock of pain was sharper than Sam had known it was possible to feel, vivid fire racing across his body from one arm to the other, and he dimly understood from the line of holes seeping blood across his chest that it was automatic weapons fire that had cut him down. His last shot went wild as he collapsed to the pavement, the cobblestones hard and cold against his back, and his last thought as pain and darkness crashed over him was a fervent prayer that Jensen had gotten away.

A moment later, he was standing silent and still in the shadow of a nearby building, watching Jensen sobbing silently over his body, torn in two with grief and the desire to stay. But Sam knew even without the slim, dark-haired woman at his side telling him what it meant if he stayed that it would be the wrong thing to do. As much as his heart ached for the loss Jensen was suffering and would suffer for years to come, he knew Jensen was strong. He could survive without Sam, maybe even find someone else to love someday, and the consequences of staying as a spirit were more than Sam could take.

The instant he'd consciously decided, there was a bright light around him, a whoosh of sound, and then there were arms closing around him: Dean's, with that full, joyful laugh that Sam had craved hearing, and then Dad with a warm, "I'm proud of you, son," and then Mom was holding him close like she'd never been able to in life, and Sam knew he'd made the right decision.

He'd come home.


End file.
